How to change your habits

 By: John Bino

Photo: powerofmindcontrol.com

If you were a driver, then you would relate easily to this regular occurrence that all drivers have come to experience at some point in time. Many times I have noticed to my amazement that whenever I am on the phone (hands-free, of course), while driving a frequented route, I end up reaching my destination without even realizing it. All I remember is that I got on the phone and now I am parked at the destination. It’s miraculous how your brain takes complete control of where you are going without any conscious effort from your side, provided it’s a frequented or regular route. I want you to re-read the last part of the sentence ‘provided it’s a frequented or regular route’. You know why this happens? If you can truly understand the ‘why’, you will end up having the answer to most of life’s mysteries.

The reason why it happens is because your mind follows instructions, without any conscious effort, that have been repeated over and over to it. This phenomenon can be summed up in one word – Habit. It’s the power of a habit that is at work here.

Now see what happens when a new path has to be taken. The other day when I was driving back home from work, I wanted to drop by at Burger King to pick up some grub. I consciously thought about it before I started the car. I had to take a different route than my regular route if I had to get to Burger King. As I was underway, I received a phone call. I got busy on the phone and by the time I finished with the call, I had already parked my car. As I was getting out I exclaimed, "Oh, Shoot!" Why? Because I was parked in front of my house! I had totally forgotten about the Burger King while driving, and my mind took me back on the regular road.

Now what happened here? I stopped thinking about Burger King the moment I got on the phone. And because of that, my mind got reset to the previously set pattern of thinking and got me home instead. The lesson to be learnt here is that you should always make a conscious effort to keep the thought of the new destination in mind UNTIL YOU REACH YOUR DESTINATION. So how does one do it?

Imagine if I had written on an A4 sheet of paper ‘Burger King’ and placed it on the dashboard where I could see it. You think I would remember to stop by. In probability, "Yes!" So, if you want to arrive at a different destination than your habitual one, you need to take effort to remind yourself of the new destination again and again, till you reach it. There is no two ways about it.

So is there a life lesson in this? Yes, and it’s huge! Say for example, you are a very timid person by nature, and you want to become bold. First, you have to understand and realize that you are a timid person because it has become a habit to you. So your mind naturally will go in that direction. In order for your mind to take a different destination i.e. being bold, you need to re‘mind’ yourself to be bold every time and keep on at it, till you become bold. And to do that, write the words ‘Day by Day in every way I am getting bolder and bolder’ and stick it up in front of your bed where you can see it CLEARLY, before you go to sleep and right after you wake up. And before you realize it, you will keep getting bolder and bolder. Keep the sheet up there till ‘being bold’ has become a habit, and you are sure that you are a new person.

Likewise, you can apply this technique to anything and everything. If you don’t believe what I am saying, try it for a week and see if there is any difference in your behavior. But apply it for the good of mankind, and not otherwise.

God Bless.

John Bino is an entrepreneur and success coach specializing in helping fellow entrepreneurs and the community at large to realize their true potential. His mission is to help people become more valuable to their family and the marketplace.

For more information on John Bino or to contact him, go to either his blog http://www.parentsINCorporated.com or to his business website http://www.earnwhatyoudeserve.com
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The Reason Why You’re Depressed

 By: Sophie Henshaw

Photo: eatshrinkandbehappy.com

Do you want to know why you’re feeling down so much? It boils down to the leading cause, SELF-HATRED, also known as SELF-JUDGEMENT. Self-hatred always accompanies depression.JUDGEMENTS are a sham and FACTS are REAL; the two should never be mistaken.Judgement lies at the core of your depression and REALITY is the TREATMENT.All self-Judgements have the following features:

=> 1. DICHOTOMIES:Judgements only offer a black and white view of the world, with no subtleties. Things can either be nice/horrid, moral/immoral, or powerful/powerless.

=> 2. COMPARISONS with other people or an ultimate self: "Compared with her "I’m useless" or "compared with my beauty ideal, I fail".

=> 3. AN IDEAL SELF that you "should" measure up to.Actually you are and always will be a ACTUAL human being and NOT an ideal that has perfection as its standard and therefore is always unattainable to attain.As an actual human being, you don’t get to select which feelings and experiences you want based on what’s satisfactory to you – like it or not you get the whole lot, warts and all!

=> 4. THE "SHOULDS"and "musts" of internal dialogue are potent signs of self-judgement.

=> 5. ARBITRARY, VAGUE, GENERAL:All judgements are random and do not have a rational connection with reality nor do they have precise, measurable criteria.What’s the point of labelling yourself as "hopeless", "dumb", "weak" or anything else?If we consider how to assess the actual truth of a judgement, might we be able to use a precise measure, like amount of tax paid, to find out if the label ""useless" actually does apply?You can see for yourself how pointless these statements are..

=> 6. PERVASIVE, REPETITIVE AND SHORTHAND:Self-judgements use shorthand, quick, easy, phrases that are highly memorable and repeat like a mantra but are very low on precision.

=> 7. CONSCIOUS & UNCONSCIOUS:Self-judgement will catch you unawares: you will only be aware of the most miniscule, plainest of it.Unconscious forms of self-hatred are very potent and can only be transformed with the help of a competent professional.

BEWARE! People are killed from self-hatred!Here below condenses a March 2010 article in the West Australian Online. It demonstrates how perilous a skewed, self-hating attitude can be.

Charmaine Dragun, a well-known news anchor who suffered from depression for 10 years, died by jumping from a Sydney cliff in 2007. In a cut-throat industry, Charmaine couldn’t afford to let any chink in her armour show for fear of being overthrown by other pretty girls who were determined to to get the job.She didn’t want anyone to think she couldn’t handle the pressure. Charmaine once delivered a bulletin that her bosses thought was wonderful, which for her was the "worst bulletin ever".She missed the truth that she was exceedingly capable and articulate by harshly denying and minimizing her true abilities. She was sure that she would eventually be sacked for being unpopular with the public and executives.Her friends knew she really was brilliant but they couldn’t convince her of that fact.She minimised the prestige of her job by declaring it was dull and that she was only "reading words that other people had created written.

Charmaine Dragun, whose charm lit up a room, was a highly intelligent, stunning and articulate TV journalist.Friends and colleagues were fond of her and her bosses admired the standards of her work.They wanted her to continue doing well in her role for as long as possible.She gave of her best and shone at what she did.Her hard work and talent stood out above the competition and won her the job.Other people envied her unique gifts and good fortune.Her nearest and dearest will miss her terribly..

Healing from depression requires a whole-hearted devotion and commitment.Those who suffer from depression have to replace distorted and hateful self-judgements with an innate understanding of actual reality.Trusted and competent expert help is essential in order to achieve a deep and embodied understanding of this knowledge as opposed to a mere surface, intellectual understanding. To learn more, visit our Henshaw Consulting - Psychologists Perth website where you can get the help you need from an expert Clinical Psychologist Perth.

Dr. S Henshaw is a Perth-based clinical psychologist with over 20 years’ experience helping people to alleviate their depression and anxiety. To learn more, visit: http://www.henshawconsulting.com.au
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Relaxation Training Takes Stress Away

By: Amanda Goldsmith 

Photo: buzzle.com

Let's say you just returned from the doctor's office. When you dashed into the reception area, your heart was racing and pounding so hard that you thought you must be having a heart attack.

Fortunately, it's not your heart, but it is a warning response to stress overload. Your doctor tells you to try relaxation training to reduce your stress. Relax? You don't have time to relax, but you don't have time for a heart attack either - so you begrudgingly agree to give relaxation training a shot.

At first, relaxation isn’t a do-it-yourself project. After all, you were the one who got yourself into this stress mess, so do you really think you know how to change it? The good news is that once you learn relaxation techniques, you can practice them anywhere on your own. It's a truly portable therapy.

Psychotherapy – Your doctor may refer you to a psychologist or mental health counselor. Don't worry – it doesn’t mean that you’re "mentally ill." What you don't know is that unless you get your stress and mood under management, you may be headed for a more serious psychological disorder.

Mental health professionals are also trained to teach you visualization, stress inoculation and other techniques that help you manage your stress. But these are therapies you might be able to learn on your own using DVD and CD tutorials.

Hypnosis – Hypnotists can teach you relaxation techniques using self-hypnosis. Contrary to false beliefs, you won’t suddenly quack like a duck or howl at the moon. These techniques are used by medical and psychological professionals for stress and pain management. In a few sessions you can learn all you need to know to do this on your own.

Yoga – Take a series of classes to learn the basic Yoga movements. This ancient technique involves the mind and body so completely that you relax, stretch and develop flexibility all at the same time.

You can get DVDs and books to help you with the moves at home. Rather than do this alone, schedule a Yoga class at least twice a week and pre-pay. That will motivate you to get out of the house or the office and get into an environment better suited for the relaxation of practicing Yoga.

Art or Photography – You don't have to know anything about either of these to enjoy them. Forget perfectionism and just put some paint on a canvas or shoot some pictures. Go outdoors to a tranquil park, garden or solarium to practice your craft.

You aren't trying to become proficient - just enjoy what you create. The time spent studying your subjects and looking at the results is what counts. Being creative, particularly if this is completely different than your usual work, can be highly relaxing.

Act like a kid – Choose a day twice a month when you act like a kid. Go to the park and swing. Draw on the driveway with colored chalk. Watch funny movies in your pajamas well into the afternoon.

Do something that is carefree and just plain fun. Once your stress level is down, keep up the relaxation training or you'll be back in the same overload situation again. It may sound silly, but relaxing is something some people have to learn because it doesn’t come easy to them.

Amanda Goldsmith has find useful information about Driving fear Program so if you want to get rid of your fear of driving, please take a moment to check out 'The Driving Fear Program" Get a free copy of anxiety game from http://drivingfearaway.com. You can also discover write up for Driving fear on http://drivingfearaway.com/blog
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Don't Let Communication Anxiety Drag You Down

 By: Anthony Diclementi

Photo: bellagab.com

Communication anxiety, also referred to as public speech anxiety is a common occurrence among people. Those people, who probably show a great deal of confidence in most situations, will avoid a situation where public speaking is involved. In fact, these people experience communication anxiety due to stress. In a survey conducted on 'fears', a majority of people rated public speaking as a fate worse than death.

Communication Anxiety And Anxiety Disorder

The symptoms of communication anxiety are generally accompanied by uneasiness. Depending on the degree of uneasiness, it could mean that the individual cares enough about the audience to want to speak well. In such cases, it becomes a positive situation where it motivates the individual to do better. When the anxiety is excessive, it turns into an anxiety disorder. Some people also go through social anxiety disorder. This makes them uncomfortable in public and anxious even in their daily routine whether it involves interpersonal skills with one person or a group. They carry a constant fear of being watched or judged by others. This chronic fear can lead to emotional upsets and health problems. Roughly 15 million Americans suffer from social anxiety disorder. Since it is so similar to communication anxiety, the two can often be confused.

Communication Training

If you suffer from communication anxiety, you can seek communication training to help you overcome it. These training sessions teach the participants the techniques and interpersonal skills to help them handle communication with ease and confidence. Their listening skills are also enhanced so that they may recognize and circumvent communication barriers. Communication training also helps understand what effective verbal and non-verbal communication is all about. In addition to this, the following are covered:
* Different communication styles and how to recognize them and identifying your own style
* How to assess your communication
* How to use the right words to express yourself
* Verbal and nonverbal communication skills

These communication-training sessions also cover telephone skills and help the individual make a plan of action so that they may work at improving their interpersonal skills on an ongoing basis.

Tips

People who experience a high level of communication anxiety certainly need help, and often, self-help can make a big difference. Here are some tips that can overcome the anxiety.

1. Adequate preparation
In a public speaking situation, the communication anxiety manifests itself most during the first five minutes, after which it gets better. To resolve this, good preparation can help since being prepared will increase confidence. If there is a fear of forgetting, you might want to use mnemonics to help you recall vital points. Needless to say, plenty of practice is also essential.

2. Advance Self talk
Realize that you feel excitement, not fear. Public speaking is a wonderful opportunity where you get to share your expertise. When you look at it from this angle, you will feel a sense of power rather than fear or anxiety.

3. Deep breathing exercises
It is a fact that slow deep breathing can help communication anxiety and bring down stress levels. When you are anxious, it is tough to be normal.

4. Think positive
When you think about events that make you happy, or people you love, create mental imagery of these things. This will boost your energy and make you more confident, helping you combat your anxiety.

Communication anxiety is easy to overcome with the tips outlined above. You can even consider nutritional supplements that can help you increase your confidence levels, boost your energy and reduce stress. The benefits of SociaTropin, the world's first social enhancing and anxiety-eliminating nutritional supplement are being enjoyed by millions of people. SociaTropin is designed to elevate emotional well-being, eliminate social anxiety, and boost natural energy levels to significantly improve a person's relationships and social life.


Don't accept another day living anything but the life you deserve. Try SociaTropin Today, Risk-Free! Discover the most effective natural supplement for communication anxiety by visiting us at www.SociaTropin.com
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The 3 Questions That Will Change Your Life

 By Roy Naim

Photo: cyt-images.s3.amazonaws.com

Brendon Burchard, Found of Experts Academy, shared with us 3 questions he would ask himself daily, and it is the same three questions one would ask at the end of their lives.
These questions forces you to think and act accordingly. They make you stop and revamp everything you have been doing now. The beauty of these three questions that Brendon shared with us is that since we are going to be asking them anyway, why not ask them now and live a life that we want.
Did I Live?
This question alone will shake us up. Asking if we lived a life of honesty and a life that we want to, will have us think about creating the life what we want. There is no reason why we can't create the life we want and by asking this one question, one will think and ask "what type of life do I want?"
Did I Love?
Are our relationships with others in place. Are there areas we can improve ourselves in? Did I make peace with everyone?
Working with many cancer patient, I've found that they want to make sure that their relationship problems are resolved. They want to make sure that everyone is OK and that they are OK with others.
Start saying 'I love you more'. Start showing you love them more. And start loving again.
Did I Matter?
Society is driven by two things. Self growth and contribution. People have a need to give to others, in whatever way that they can. And this question will surely have you going out there and making sure you are making the difference that makes the difference.
Never underestimate making a change in one person life, because helping one person will surely impact their future, their families and the future families. A world of people. And then you can say with certainty, you matter.

Roy Naim has overcome many obstacles in business and life. Through his journey he acquired the knowledge to be able to overcome those limitations and now shares it with others so they can do the same. To learn more about Roy Naim, go to his blog at http://RoyNaim.com.

Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Roy_Naim

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How to Manage Your Stress

 By Danial Hurley

Photo: media.rd.com

Although technology has come a long way in helping people with their daily activities, it is still easy for a person to get stressed. However, it is important for any individual to manage their stress because if it is left unmanaged, stress can lead to various physical and psychological conditions such as obesity, depression, anxiety disorders and high blood pressure. If you're unable to overcome stress, here are several tips that may help you.
To start with, learn the sources of your stress and try to minimize your exposure to such sources. For example, don't overload yourself with office works. Learn to say no to your boss, if you think that you're still on a very important task, unless the task that your boss is giving you is more important.
Also, eat healthy foods and never skip a meal. Always include fish and vegetables in your weekly diet. As you know, fishes contain omega-3 fatty acids that are able to help the body in producing a chemical known as serotonin, which is responsible for the feeling of pleasure. On the other hand, vegetables are ideal foods because they contain vitamins and minerals that will help you gain enough energy and focus to help you deal with your daily activities.
Thirdly, try to do some hobbies like painting or weaving. These activities will help you forget about your responsibilities in the office, thereby helping you to relax. In addition, getting hobbies may also help you gain more self-esteem.
Fourth, during weekends, you may schedule fun family activities. You and your family can go to the beach or watch movies or just about anything that will help you take your mind off of the sources of your stress. Now, if in case you don't have children, you can just schedule a romantic date with your partner or night out with your friends.
Lastly, you can also try exercising or practicing meditation. As you know, both of these are able to help you feel relax and good about yourself by allowing your body to produce pleasure-inducing chemicals like serotonin and dopamine.

Now if you want to know more about meditation and it many benefits, you may visit www.meditate.com.au or www.meditate.com.au/members.
Danial Hurley is an expert is a health care expert that specializes studies about alternative medicine like meditation, etc.

Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Danial_Hurley

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How to Keep a Positive Mindset and Achieve Your Goals

 By John W Robertson

Photo: frankfitnesstrainer.co.uk

If you aren't one yourself, I bet you know one. You know - that person at work who blames everything on other people, the team mate who doesn't pull their weight and always has an excuse why they aren't performing.
Most people have, at one time or another, felt down. We've all been stressed at some point and lashed out at someone we loved. We have all lost sight of our goals, due to conditions we feel are outside of our direct control.
Ever look back and realize that most of the time those conditions weren't outside of your control? In fact, they weren't even outside of you! Your mindset and attitude are the largest factors in your ability to maintain a positive mindset, stay motivated, and achieve your goals.
Here are five tips I recommend to help you keep a positive mindset and keep you on the path to achieving your goals.
Visualizations - It's hard to feel positive if you feel lost, if you have no direction in life. You can make as many plans for greatness and success as you like, but nothing brings them home like taking time to see yourself already there.
Acceptance - It begins inside. No one is to blame for your situation except you. No one else can be blamed for your negative attitude. Accept responsibility for your actions, for your current faults and instead of blaming anyone (including yourself) look at this as an opportunity for growth.
You wouldn't look at a new born baby and blame it for not being able to talk the day he was born; we look at our children and imagine the possibilities. Adults are no different, look at yourself and see the potential.
Affirmations - Consider who you want to be, what you want to achieve and find or develop some affirmations you can repeat out loud to yourself daily. Telling yourself daily that you can do it, that you can achieve, that you have what it takes to not only succeed, but to exceed your expectations is a powerful way to train your mind to stay positive.
Gratitude - No matter what your situation, if you are reading this you are better off than many, and have a lot to be grateful for (you can read for starters!). Look at what you have and be grateful for it - express your gratitude every single day.
Celebrate Life - Nothing keeps the mind healthy like a celebration. Celebrate every little victory, celebrate your family and friends, celebrate being alive. Celebrations are times of joy and thankfulness, and shared celebrations carry an excellent feel-good factor, not only for your mind but generally your body too.
These are only five of many tips you can use to stay positive minded, what do you do to keep a positive mental attitude?

I've had my share of ups and downs in my life, and I can tell you I am long past the downs. It doesn't take a lot to keep a positive mindset, it doesn't take grand gestures and massive effort - it's the small daily rituals and routines that make the difference. Self Improvement is a continuous process, one that won't ever end, and is only one of the topics I discuss in the Mindset section of my blog, go check it out and let me know what you think.

Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=John_W_Robertson

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