Life Is Too Short to Stay Angry

 By Amy Sherman 

Photo: hongkiat.com

Life is so precious and so short. Then why do we waste so much time acting in ways that are harmful to us? Most people I meet say they want is to be happy and to live a peaceful life. However, we all know how difficult that can be. After all, things happen that annoy, frustrate and hurt us. We have the right to get angry. But if you're the type who gets angry at all sorts of things, you may want to look into how you are creating your own misery. In fact, anger can do terrible things to your mind and body and can even shorten your life.
By holding on to your anger, you are not allowing yourself to be forgiving. This makes you skeptical of others and fearful about getting hurt again. The problem with this attitude is that you become bitter and over time your optimism and trust diminishes; you become less tolerant of others and perhaps a little too rude and sarcastic. Plus, your body remains tense, nervous and agitated and it gets harder to shake those feelings of hostility and displeasure.

Therefore, to ruminate, rehash and mope about things that already happened, just doesn't work well on your emotional well-being So, if your goal in the latter part of your life is to have more close relationships, many friends, cordial colleagues, and an active social life, then recognize how your thoughts are self-defeating and sabotaging your good intentions.

You can ask yourself the following questions to get an honest reality check on your thinking:
1. Does being angry relax you or incite you?
2. Does blaming others make you feel loving or disconnected?
3. Does shouting really help you communicate better or does it alienate you?
4. Does worrying make you feel good or create more tension?

It seems obvious that harboring a lot of anger may actually be harmful. Understand that if you can't change your situation, you need to find another way to respond or let it go. Become aware of your reaction to things, and you'll find you have a tendency to make things worse than they actually are. Don't be like the woman who hadn't spoken to her father for three weeks and when she finally decided to make amends, he died suddenly.

Life is too short to stay angry, since there's barely enough time to do the happy, fun things. Don't waste those precious moments being angry when the time can be better spent pursuing your dreams and fulfilling your bliss. Anger has its place and time. Just don't let anger get so out of hand that it determines your daily mind-set. Your happiness depends not on your set of circumstances, but rather on how you act on it.

Amy Sherman, MA, is a therapist and Relationship/Dating Coach. She is the author of "Distress-Free Aging: A Boomer's Guide to Creating a Fulfilled and Purposeful Life" and co-author of "99 Things Women Wish They Knew Before Dating After 40, 50 and Yes, 60!" Visit http://www.yourbabyboomersnetwork.com and receive a Special Report on Overcoming Adversity when you sign up for the free eNewsletter. Amy can be reached at 561-281-2975.

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4 Proven Generalized Anxiety Disorder Treatments

 By Troy Vayanos 

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Every normal person gets anxious at one point or another. The anxiety is always caused by something specific (usually a stress factor), and goes away as soon as the cause is resolved.
A generalized anxiety disorder often has no specific trigger or cause. A person just feels a general, gnawing and nagging feeling of worry, dread, tension and nervousness. The symptoms are non-quitting, and can greatly affect a person's social, professional or personal life. As such, there needs to be quick intervention to prevent escalation into something worse (like suicide).
There are a number of generalized anxiety disorder treatments. They range from medications to lifestyle changes. The treatment option selected depends on the severity of the disorder.
The most common ones are the following:

1. Medication
Sometimes, generalized anxiety disorder treatment involves administering medications. The three common types of medications are antidepressants, Buspirone and Benzodiazepines. Antidepressants are used to mitigate the activity of neurotransmitters. The neurotransmitters are chemicals which play a central role in triggering feelings of anxiety. Buspirone is an anti-anxiety medication which is useful for making a person calm and relaxed. Benzodiazepines are sedatives which are used to mitigate the debilitating effects of acute anxiety in the short run. Examples included diazepam (Valium), alprazolam (Xanax), and lorazepam (Ativan).

2. Psychotherapy
This generalized anxiety treatment option involves the use of counselling with the goal of helping a person to deal with any underlying stressors. The main form of psychotherapy used is cognitive behavioural therapy. This empowers a person to eliminate any anxiety causing thoughts, and replace them with positive, empowering thoughts.

3. Relaxation Techniques
This treatment option is aimed at eliminating or reducing the major symptoms of generalized anxiety disorder i.e. excessive nervousness and tension. The focus is on training a patient how to calm down and relax on their own. The major relaxation techniques which are used include progressive muscle relaxation, deep breathing and meditation. These techniques empower a person to be able to control their anxiety without using medication or external help.

4. Lifestyle Changes
In some cases, generalized anxiety disorder treatment requires certain lifestyle changes. This takes the form of adopting healthier lifestyles, or eliminating lifestyles which can worsen the disorder. Usually, those who use alcohol, tobacco or other psychoactive drugs are advised to stop, since these can escalate generalized anxiety disorder. Recommended lifestyle adoptions include regular exercise, eating a healthy diet, avoiding stress and getting enough rest and/or sleep.

In a nutshell, those are the common generalized anxiety disorder treatments. When applied consistently, they can enable a person to become calm, relaxed, happy, and resume having a productive life.

Learn a simple technique to finally rid yourself of anxiety and fear for good.
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How to Motivate Yourself to Become More Productive

By Luke Howeth  

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Motivation

"Motivation is defined as the process that initiates, guides and maintains goal-oriented behaviors. Motivation is what causes us to act, whether it is getting a glass of water to reduce thirst or reading a book to gain knowledge."

Motivation in real-life terms, is the drive in which takes us to action and success. It is what gives us the will to work, usually the result of the enjoyment of the work itself and/or the desire to achieve success and goals. And success consequently is what such work results in.
It's essential to not only have but to maintain motivation, not only to succeed online but in life itself. Motivation is the one thing that allows us to look at failure as opportunity, motivation is the one thing that doesn't let you sleep until 2:00AM and gets you up at 5:00AM only to carry on working, it's that one thing that FORCES you to go the extra mile. But ultimately motivation is the one thing that naturally allows you to reach success!

Motivation within marketing

Motivation plays a crucial role in actually taking action and going forth in order to see results. As clear as that may sound - 9 times out of 10, people (myself included) start to connect with a company/individual, full of motivation for the soon future. But, maybe when you've been involved for 3 month, a month or even a matter of weeks and you STILL haven't made that sale, or your site STILL isn't ready to put launched or whatever it may be; your motivation begins to slowly disappear. Eventually, you'll accept the fact that 'you're just not good enough, it's too hard', or 'you haven't got enough time' or 'the Internet's just not for you'. Every single person goes through these stages, I can guarantee you that no body has every just came onto the internet and found success - it takes determination, desperation to find a better life... and above all healthy motivation.
How I motivate myself

I'm not saying that you should just work-work-work. That wouldn't probably play an even more negative affect, you need to keep y

ourself happy otherwise you'll become less efficient and the quality of your work will suffer.
One thing I do to both keep myself happy but also decrease procrastination is I make a deal with myself that I will do something/be allowed to do something after I've completed a certain amount of work. This could be anything from having a few beers or going to that party, to just having a walk in the park.
Set large goals. I'm a big believer in setting big, general goals as opposed to smaller ones. Big goals mean big effect, and big affect creates motivating images in your mind!

Always give recognition to your success, this can be a great motivation booster - keep some sort of journal of all the successful tasks or pieces of work you've done - no matter how big or small.
"Never ever fear failure - instead redefine it as feedback as a natural part of a successful life" - Michael Jordan

This is probably the biggest one for me. When working on a project or whatever it is you're doing. Don't just think of what you'll get as a result of it; perhaps money. But think of what your life will be like as a result of the work. For example, you could immigrate, buy you're dream home, provide a life a wealth for your family and friends. Retire your parents early - whatever you want.
If possible, find pictures of things that motivate you. Things that hold meaning within them! Things that really get your blood pumping! Somewhere you'd love to live or somewhere you'd love to go!
Just do it!

Make each day count! Everyday when you awake, think positively with a smile on your face, this little trick will make your day a lot more positive resulting in you taking more action. Resulting in those actions to naturally producing more success!

Thanks for reading! If you want to know more about how I implement these tricks into my daily life as an online marketer working online. Check out my site - http://lukehoweth.com/

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Do You Want Success, Or Just Avoiding Failure?

By Richard Brody  

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Although being successful and the components of success are so often discussed, doesn't it seem somewhat strange that it often appears that far more individuals expend the majority of their energies and attention in the quest to avoid failure, than in the pursuit of success? After over thirty years of offering personal development seminars and coaching to over a thousand individuals, I have come to realize that, for many, even the concept of personal success appears to be a fuzzy one, and thus many people merely try not to fail than to succeed! There are certain components that each of us must both define for ourselves, as well as clearly identify, if we truly wish to succeed. These include: 1) What's your plan?; 2) How do you balance and analyze risk versus reward?; 3) Will you procrastinate and thus stagnate, or be proactive and pursue greatness?; and 4) Do you fear failure, or are you afraid of success?

1. There is rarely any likelihood of true success unless we begin and focus on our plan! What is your plan, and why? How does that plan propel you forward towards the achievement of your goals, and are you willing to commit to taking the needed action?

2. Everything we choose to either do, or we fail to do, should be evaluated on the risk versus reward scale! Many times, we permit our fears to nearly paralyze us, and we therefore procrastinate rather than taking proactive steps. True success is potentiated when this risk/ reward concept is evaluated, and we proceed forward after weighing potential risks, and daring to do what others seem to fear. The reality is that there is rarely any possibility of success unless we commit to doing rather than avoiding, and it is the ability to take smart risks that propels us towards genuine and meaningful success.

3. When one selects procrastination rather than action, it almost always leads towards often harmful stagnation. Unless one acts, there is little possibility of meaningful success, and our greatest successes are a result of having the courage to dare to act when others are controlled and dominated by their fears.

4. So many people seem so fearful of failing that we often misconstrue this with the reason that individuals procrastinate. I believe, however, that in many more situations, it is the fear of success that creates this procrastinating. Why would someone fear success? Unfortunately, far too many people are satisfied in living up (or down) to the lowest and minimal expectations, and therefore come to become comfortable with mediocrity.

If you want to be successful, plan accordingly and take timely action on your planning. It's never enough to settle for merely avoiding failure!

Richard has owned businesses, been a COO, CEO, and Director of Development, as well as a consultant. He has professionally run events, consulted to over a thousand leaders, and conducted personal development seminars, for over 30 years. Rich has written three books and well over a thousand articles. His company, PLAN2LEAD, LLC has an informative website http://plan2lead.net and Plan2lead can also be followed on Facebook http://facebook.com/Plan2lead

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How to Deal With Stress at Work

 By Janet Wolfe 

Photo: mentalhealthy.co.u
 
Did you know that a full time job from age 20 to age 65, means spending over 93,000 hours working? If you don't know how to deal with stress at work, that's a lot of unhappy hours. And job stress can spill beyond your work day as well. It is possible to handle the stress of your job, however, so it doesn't take over your life. You just need a plan.

Create a DIY job stress relief plan. In a 12 Step program for job stress, this is where I would stand up and say, "Hello, I am a workaholic." Or a recovering one at least. I used to go to bed worrying about work, dream about it, and wake up stressed again. I gave it every ounce of my effort, developed a whole host of stress related ailments, and collapsed on my days off.
So, I am here to tell you, it's not worth it. If your company starts to go under, as many of mine did, your investment of blood, sweat, and tears will mean very little. Instead, if you create a plan to deal with your stress at work today, it can also help you deal with job hazards that might appear tomorrow.

1. Acknowledge that being stressed at work does not equal doing a good job. You may think your boss has to see you stressed to understand how hard you work. But letting the job stress get to you actually keeps you from doing your best. Your mind will be sharper, and you'll get more done, with a good night's sleep.
Organize the end of each work day to be ready for the next one, and you'll feel more confident going home. Get some exercise to work off tension, or do some enjoyable activity to refresh your mind. Turn off your phone, don't check your work email, and reclaim your evenings. Clear your mind before bed, and start fresh tomorrow.

2. Evaluate where your stress is coming from. Is it the work itself? Are you confused or feeling in over your head? If so, a good boss would rather you ask for clarification than do things wrong. Ask if extra training is available, or take classes to further your understanding. The more you know, the less apt you are to feel overwhelmed.
Look at all the other sources of job stress the same way. It could be your co-workers, your work schedule, or a non-stop pace. Dealing with each stressor individually is far more effective than trying to tackle them together.

3. Drop the gossip. Gossip in the workplace is a parasite. It constantly needs feeding, and only leaves bad feelings wherever it goes. At first, you may have just wanted to belong. But if the gossipers talk about everyone else, before long you'll begin to worry what they say about you. You'll stress about who might want your job, or whatever else someone might do to sabotage your career.
When you pull yourself away from workplace gossip, a lot of stress at work will magically disappear.


4. You are not responsible for other people's problems. Are you the person co-workers and subordinates turn to for support? It's nice to feel needed, until you are weighed down with their personal problems. A great boss reminded me once that camp counselor was not in my job description. It was a valuable lesson that helped me lose a lot of stress at work, and probably helped the other people learn to cope on their own.

5. If the job is wrong for you admit it and consider a change. Sometimes what was a great job once becomes not so great any more. Maybe the work itself changed, or the people you valued are gone. Or maybe you knew from day one.

Continue to do the best work you can, because you owe it to them and yourself to do so. But begin to plan an exit strategy from a position of strength. Studies have shown that a lot of job stress occurs when we have little control. Taking control of your future, and moving to a job that is a better fit, can make a significant change in how you feel, so you'll have far less stress at work to deal with.
What's your biggest stress at work? Let us know in the comments, and don't forget to share us on social media. We love hearing from you.

For more tips and great information on how to deal with stress, check out ClearYourStress.com. You'll also find many guided exercises and meditation methods to relieve stress, connect with your inner wisdom, and enjoy a balanced lifestyle. Visit ClearYourStress.com now to get started.

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Achieving Success: Minutes, Hours, Days, Years

 By Weldon Smith 

Photo: standard.co.uk
 
A successful life is made up of a string of successful days. A successful day is made up of successful hours. A successful hour is made up of successful minutes. What does a successful minute or hour or year look like?

We see people whom the less-wise and less-intelligent among us might think of as successful, and who are not really as successful as they are wealthy or famous. They could lose their wealth, their looks, or their fame just as fast as they gained it and there would be nothing left. We do, in fact, see that all the time. For example, professional athletes who age-out of sports and within a few years are bankrupt, in spite of having made millions of dollars per year for several years. It happens. They did well in their working lives, and they made a lot of money, but they were never successful and didn't know how to handle the downsides of life.
As we study successful people, we see that they have trials and opposition, the same as anyone else. They just deal with them much better.

We see other people who are very wealthy and lose it or a large portion of it, and they go to work and build it back. The wealth didn't make them successful. The success helped them become wealthy.
I have seen people who are extremely successful and have never been wealthy, and will probably never be, because they don't care about it.

We see people who seem to be successful by the world's standards, but who don't seem to have any sense. Politicians, CEOs, movie stars, athletes, and rock stars give in to very unsuccessful emotions and ruin their marriages and families through extra-marital affairs. They ruin their lives with alcohol and drugs. They break the law trying to get or stay rich. In today's world, people seem to adore them no less, and many of them keep their offices or the status or their wealth and work. But none of them can be thought of as successful. A successful person would not reach such a lofty position and then chance the ruination of it through any form of stupidity.

A good bit of success is remembering to stay successful. It's easy to get to a place where many other people wish they could be, and then think too much of ourselves, and become proud and cocky, and lose it all or do things that an intelligent person should never even consider.

Every minute, every hour, every day, every year are important to those of us wanting to be successful. And that should be everyone. Success is getting to the end of our lives having gotten as close as we are capable of being where and what we should be. For those who don't know where or what they should be, part of success if learning where and what they should be. Successful people know. If we never try, or if, anywhere along the way we give up, we can't be successful.

Now that we know what a successful life is, we can understand that each week, day, hour, and minute are the same. A successful minute is one where we are learning and working toward becoming what we are supposed to become. More of those than not in an hour is a successful hour, and more of those hours than not gives us a successful day.

Each year, I spend a week at a lake, boating, skiing, water boarding, tubing, eating, conversing, playing, and having a very good time. Is that a successful week? It is for me. I'm still learning. I'm still watching other people, and I know they are watching me. I'm still thinking. I'm still considering what I should be doing, and what I should be becoming. I'm still thinking about the beginning of my life and the end of my life, and all that is in between. And I am resting and recreating, which are important for a successful life. We can no more go through our entire lives without resting and recreating than we can go through our days without sleeping. We have to charge the batteries sometimes.

A successful life is made up of a string of successful days. Knowing that, we must press forward. Success is predictable. We can never arrive at success. If we think we've made it, we haven't. We can never stop trying to attain success. Only by keeping trying can we be successful.

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Is Fear Holding You Back?

 By Ben S. Solomon 

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Fear, this is something each and every one of us has to contend with, almost on a daily basis. Even the greatest athlete, the most successful business person and the seemingly courageous people out there, have to contend with their fears. The thing that separates the average people from the top performers is the fact that they find ways to deal with their fears and work on conditioning themselves to take action, in spite of the fear.
Fear is a natural response built into us. This was built in to protect us from the unknown and help us survive. But this can manifest itself now in ways that we wouldn't think of.

The next time you hesitate to write that eBook you have been thinking about or that blog post that could help a bunch of people or shy away from doing an audio or video recording of some information that you have, and think at least one other person might find useful, I urge you to take a chance. It took me a lot of courage to get off my backside and do what I'm doing. When creating content, you need to also be prepared to deal with criticism. There is always going to be a portion of the population that is going to criticize anything you do, and if you let them stop you from adding value to the world, then someone out there is missing out on valuable information that only are able to provide with your unique understanding of it.

The greatest mistake I believe we can make is dismissing ourselves. When we keep doing this constantly, either due to external input or internal self-talk. Our internal self-talk, if it is negative and self-dismissive, can be very poisonous. This can hold us back from taking action that we know we should be taking and creating content that we could be creating. One of the best things I've personally done is look at my self-talk that had been negative and self-dismissive, due to various reasons, and working on it to gain confidence.

You are worth it. Your knowledge and the information that you have to share with the world is worth every penny. So take heart, and start creating wonderful content that you alone can uniquely create. God has instilled this in each and every one of us. We need to keep exercising this skill of taking positive action, till is becomes embedded in our subconscious and becomes automatic.

Don't let fear rule over the action you can take today to provide wonderful value to others out there.

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