By
Rachel F Hill
Photo: a1.mzstatic.com
Have you ever experienced feeling awkward and shy when you are out with others because you lack the techniques that make effective conversation starters? When this happens, you can feel as if no-one likes you, wants to talk to you or even that you don't belong there.
Really, all this means is that you are not practiced at using conversation success strategies. So, to begin with you need to know how to start a conversation the simple way. It's surprising how much difference this little technique will make.
You are probably used to starting a conversation with something like this:
You: "Hi, how are you?"
Response: "Good. And you?"
You: "Great"
Once the intro is out of the way you are faced with an uncomfortable pause. Both parties glance around the room as if the answer for how to get out of this awkward situation is somewhere out there. Now you are thinking "What next?" and feeling mighty uncomfortable too. What normally happens next is one or both of you quietly move away or one watches the other disappear. And this reinforces your own perception that you are not easy to like. You might even promise yourself that you will wait for someone else to start and so shrink back into the shadows to spend the evening watching everyone else have a good time. Of course this all reinforces that you are no good at striking up conversations and you swear that you will avoid coming again.
The good news is that this is very easy to change and the torture of these kinds of conversations can be relegated to the past. So, how do you do achieve it? Its simple really.
All you need to do is to give a little more information about yourself and the other person will have something to springboard off into a conversation. Try this next time someone asks you how you are. Try saying "I'm good. I've just come back from a lovely holiday and I feel so relaxed." By adding in a little extra you have opened up possibilities for the other person to ask "Oh? What did you do?" or perhaps "Sounds great. I've just come back from Alaska, myself." This, in turn, gives you the opportunity to ask them about their holiday or you can talk about what you did on yours - even if you didn't do anything special you can say something like "I had a lovely time at home sorting out those things you never seem to get to when you work all the time."
Can you see how a great conversation starter provides the impetus for getting into a really rewarding conversation. And all you did was give a little more information rather than a single word answer.
The point of this simple technique is not to reveal all your deepest thoughts and fears. Its not about telling your life story - its simply about adding in a few details so that people can converse with you and for you to get the opportunity to find out a little bit about them.
You can see how it takes just a little effort to completely change how a conversation goes. Add that little bit extra in the first exchange and you will find that conversations are fun and interesting. You will discover new and interesting facts about people you interact with every day.
Photo: a1.mzstatic.com
Have you ever experienced feeling awkward and shy when you are out with others because you lack the techniques that make effective conversation starters? When this happens, you can feel as if no-one likes you, wants to talk to you or even that you don't belong there.
Really, all this means is that you are not practiced at using conversation success strategies. So, to begin with you need to know how to start a conversation the simple way. It's surprising how much difference this little technique will make.
You are probably used to starting a conversation with something like this:
You: "Hi, how are you?"
Response: "Good. And you?"
You: "Great"
Once the intro is out of the way you are faced with an uncomfortable pause. Both parties glance around the room as if the answer for how to get out of this awkward situation is somewhere out there. Now you are thinking "What next?" and feeling mighty uncomfortable too. What normally happens next is one or both of you quietly move away or one watches the other disappear. And this reinforces your own perception that you are not easy to like. You might even promise yourself that you will wait for someone else to start and so shrink back into the shadows to spend the evening watching everyone else have a good time. Of course this all reinforces that you are no good at striking up conversations and you swear that you will avoid coming again.
The good news is that this is very easy to change and the torture of these kinds of conversations can be relegated to the past. So, how do you do achieve it? Its simple really.
All you need to do is to give a little more information about yourself and the other person will have something to springboard off into a conversation. Try this next time someone asks you how you are. Try saying "I'm good. I've just come back from a lovely holiday and I feel so relaxed." By adding in a little extra you have opened up possibilities for the other person to ask "Oh? What did you do?" or perhaps "Sounds great. I've just come back from Alaska, myself." This, in turn, gives you the opportunity to ask them about their holiday or you can talk about what you did on yours - even if you didn't do anything special you can say something like "I had a lovely time at home sorting out those things you never seem to get to when you work all the time."
Can you see how a great conversation starter provides the impetus for getting into a really rewarding conversation. And all you did was give a little more information rather than a single word answer.
The point of this simple technique is not to reveal all your deepest thoughts and fears. Its not about telling your life story - its simply about adding in a few details so that people can converse with you and for you to get the opportunity to find out a little bit about them.
You can see how it takes just a little effort to completely change how a conversation goes. Add that little bit extra in the first exchange and you will find that conversations are fun and interesting. You will discover new and interesting facts about people you interact with every day.
You have learned an amazingly easy conversation starter. For more secrets, don't wait go right now to http://www.conversationstarters.biz
Article Source:
http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Rachel_F_HillArticle Source: http://EzineArticles.com/7211029
No comments:
Post a Comment