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Thursday, November 25, 2010

Setting Your Criteria for Personal Success

 By Justine Simard


Even though I'm a strong believer that success should be seen as a journey rather than a final outcome, all of us have goals which are determined by our own definition of success, and success itself is usually defined in terms of things that must be achieved. All of us use different standards when defining success.
Here is a question: Why do we set the bar high or low when we decide on our goals and what we are going to believe as a success? And I don't mean high or low in comparison to other people here, because everyone has their personal system of reference when it comes to standards in personal achievement. Rather, why don't we always set goals to our own personal best standard? Why is our criteria of success not always determined by our ultimate potential or our ambitions and most meaningful dreams, our greatest competencies, our highest standards? Why don't we always aim for the absolute best outcomes with reference to our own definition of success or absolute potential?
As we define success for ourselves, around any specific goal or outcome, we now have an alternative between big success and small success. The route to success for each of those options might be quite different as each success or goal represents several challenges. These might be real or just perceived, so we may consider that attaining massive success calls for massive struggle. In my illustration, see that the big mountain represents big success with bigger challenges, and that the small mountain symbolizes a smaller success that is likely to be more convenient to achieve.
When we set our goals, there are several beliefs (conscious or unconscious) affecting how high we set the bar. There are various factors which might have an effect on our standards for personal success and how we set our goals. Here are the key ones:
Fear of Failure or Fear of Success
Fear is known for having paralyzing effect in itself, but when we nurture the assumption that we can fail at something, or that we're not skilled or deserving to achieve success, it gets very tempting to stop pursuing it, or to change the goal so that we are able to diminishes that fear. If you didn't have fear of success or fear of failure, if you chose you could have the ability to succeed at your highest objectives, and if you were confident that you either have what it requires or will get what it takes to succeed, if you believed that you could achieve success, and really deserve to be successful at your highest standard, how different would your goals be?
Faith and Expectation
Once we set goals and we define success for ourselves, we're very more likely to set goals that we expect to achieve. Why set goals that we assume we won't achieve? This really affects how we carry ourselves in the process, in the way we take action, and how we impact on our environment. Faith has a significant effect on perseverance, tenacity, patience and determination. Expectation is so powerful as it opens us to receive, and it also causes us to conduct ourselves as if we've already received what we want! And when you enter a situation or a challenge with that attitude, then you are already half way there! So developing faith and expecting success will give rise to your thoughts, behaviors, feelings and the universe to align to bring about that success.
Limiting Beliefs
Limiting beliefs are beliefs, conscious or unconscious, that conflict with our goals and dreams. They may inhibit us from reaching our goals due to the discrepancy between what we want to realise, and what we think we can achieve, what we believe we deserve to have, or what we expect we are able to achieve. There may also be a conflict with our goals and our own integrity or values. The important thing here is to review your goals and discover whether you've any beliefs that conflict with your ethics or your expectation of success. So ask yourself whether you might have lowered your standards for success or made your goals smaller to avoid that conflict and stay in line with your limiting beliefs.
All of us have been told or have thought to ourselves that we were unrealistic about some of our goals and dreams. Whenever you adjust your goal to what is actually realistically possible determined by your own resources and attributes, and not according to your past achievements or what your limiting beliefs or others are telling you, then that goal can be set a lot higher. When we're trying to be realistic, it's not always real, since the reality of what's possible and what we can attain might be better than we and others think, realistically!
Integrity, Desire and Purpose
We every now and then set goals that are not consistent with our real desires, our sense of purpose and our integrity. For instance, we could say we want to be rich, but deep down it may not be what really motivates us. So it's really important when we set our targets to match them to our own genuine self, to our most important and meaningful desires, to our greater sense of purpose, and to our own personal mission. Because as I've discussed earlier, when there's a conflict between our goals and our values, we are unlikely to really pursue that goal and succeed at achieving it.
Response to Challenges
A challenge can be received as two things: an opportunity for growth, or an obstacle. And depending on the mindset that we adopt before going into the challenge, we will either embrace the process or feel frustrated and held back. And when we set our goals, we assess what will be required for us to realise that goal. When facing challenges, you may believe that the obstacle or challenge is not worth taking up, or is too daunting. And that mindset may cause you to choose the smaller mountain. And at times, just because of our mindset, we miscalculate challenges. We see the mountain bigger than it actually is. And we also dismiss the fact that if we start climbing it, there may just be some things that happen along the way that help us reach the top. Consequently, we might make choices that take away some opportunities.
Everyone has 2 mountains. This is not 2 mountains for two separate groups of people. When you look at your 2 mountains, the amount of success you desire for yourself in relation to your own personal aspirations and dreams, and your individual abilities - and when you assess the challenges - which mountain will you choose?
Success really is a process and not just an end result. So once you've decided on your mountain to climb and on what you anticipate finding when you reach to top - even though you don't know the path and the challenges you'll encounter on the way - then enjoying the process and embracing what it throws at you is a goal in itself, because you know that you're moving forward in the direction of your most meaningful and ambitious goals.
Justine Simard is an online business and network marketing coach. To understand more from Justine Simard and tap into the most effective and profitable marketing systems and online business industry, visit Home Business Opportunity. Also visit Justine Simard's Official Blog for Online Business Resources, internet marketing training, personal development and success strategies, and inspiration for online entrepreneurs.

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