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Tuesday, August 17, 2010

Why Having Good Friends is So Important

 by Roseanna Leaton

We all need friends around us.  We like to share our lives and our thoughts.  This is part of the way we live and central to how we build our sense of self.

If you watched the movie "Bride Wars" you will have seen a great depiction of the importance of having good girl friends. Those two girls had been friends since they were knee high to a grass-hopper and total devastation was caused when they had a fall out. They had no-one else who they could talk to in the same way. The sense of loss and hurt was clearly shown.

The sense of betrayal was even worse when one sensed the other doing something which was hurtful. Anyone else could have done that same thing and it wouldn't have mattered very much; but when it's your best friend who does something like that - that is just NOT on. We rely on our friends support and shoulders more often than we fully appreciate.

We are social creatures and have a basic need for the company of other human beings. We require the love of a mate and also close ties of friendship and family. Other people are important to us. We like to share. I was reminded of this fact on several different occasions in just one week, as I spent some fun hours with friends, both old and new.

There's a different dimension to the friendship which you have with other girls as opposed to your "mate"; the same needless to say is true in reverse. You can say anything and you usually know what each other is thinking. When it's a friend who you have known for years, you have a lot of shared history.

But what happens when you move to a new home in a different part of the world? Yes, in this day and age of easy communication it's not difficult to keep in touch, but you can't just pop round to the other's house and sit chatting on the sofa. How do you go about making new friends?

You have to make an effort to go to places where you will meet people with similar interests. Clubs and classes of all description are usually the best port of call. You begin with something in common, and that's really all that is needed so as to open the door to making new friends. With long term friends, your interests tend to grow and develop together as you grow. But with new friends you get to meet them through the interests you already have or those which you choose to pursue. This is yet another type of friendship - the "grown up" friendship, if you like!

But these new friends can still develop into the same "giggling-girl-friends" as well. And we all need to giggle, laugh and smile. It's important to have this light hearted company and the camaraderie of shared interests. Life should be fun! Girls need to be girls together just as boys will be boys.

I was lunching with a friend the other day who was analyzing the population who had gone to watch the Masters in Augusta. She assessed that it was 80% male only groups, 19% country-club couples and 1% female only groups. It was an interesting observation. Golf is still a very "male" sport, especially when it comes to watching a tournament. But golf is becoming increasingly more patronized and played by women. I myself have made a lot of great "girl-friends" through this game.

Making friends is an important part of the cycle of life. Self confidence is something which is central to the ease with which you can make friends. If you are comfortable in your own skin and comfortable in all sorts of different types of company it is easy to meet people and to build friendships. Having a common interest adds just another "link" in the chain of friendship.

Roseanna LeatonFeature Articles, specialist in hypnosis confidence mp3s to help create good relationships.

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